June 6, 2010
So I finally went back to the dance scene. I had originally set up two bboys in my crew to enter the doubles battle but as the time got closer one of the dancers canceled so at the last second his partner taught me some things they had been working on. I hadn’t battled in about 5 years and although my dancing had improved I didn’t feel my power was up to it. I was. so nervous. my dance partner kept me strong. and kept. going through moves with me.
I decided to take as small amount of meds I could to get through the night as best I could giving room for face pain. only 1cloazepam, the second half of the days painkillers, (this bothers me as I Have no break through pain meds. so I have to rely on clonazepam.) I also hadn’t eaten n a while so we had some pizza a couple hours before the battle.
we were dropped off in the city. we ran across the road to the alley we could see b boys as, soon as we entered we went inside and down the stairs to a basement (for some reason I’m always afraid the building will collapse when I’m n a basement. as we walked down the stairs. we could see some of the bboy dancing and hear some funky beats as we sat looking from afar we chatted and tried to loose our irrational nerves a lot of old faces were there and greeted both of us warmly. this was my dance partners first time at any battle or dance public ever. out of no where he started to get very nervous and was begging me to find anther partner. I knew he was wrong and I knew he would shine once he started his moves. he started to see he could do it. we got called up second round they announced our name, I turned to look at him he was looking stronger he followed me onto the dance floor. we let the other crew start first then we took it in turns. my partner was doing some off the best I had seen he even made up a move a couple of hours before it started and pulled it off better in the battle. after they stopped the battle the judges made they’re decision and gave us a draw they asked for another round we looked at each other in amazement I could see excitement all over his face I must have looked the same. It was lucky I hadn’t taken to much anti anxiety meds I did the next round I stepped back to see the judges and they had again drew us by now we were very excited. K told me to do a mill and some footwork during the second round tie break I felt exhausted and satisfied. The judges eventually decided on them as the winners. We were so happy with our efforts we gave huge thanks to our opponents for the absolute enjoyment we all had such a good night and we are thrilled to the bone by our efforts.
January 5, 2010
Not the TN but that all over body/joint aching pain. I can’t stand it. Still trying to dance an hour a day if I can (hurts alot) But it one of the only things I have that will cheer me up any time. My knees arms , elbows, wrists, neck. n more. I am seeing the doctor tomorrow so maybe I’ll mention it to him. I really don’t like to be looked at as weak or a whinger. I guess If I wake up worse then today I will have to say something.
I have been painting and keeping my word so far to learn more everyday and try to look after myself.
On another big note I am still waiting for a good friend to recover in hospital. I am sending him and his wife and children good vibes I hope he recovers quickly.
May 7, 2009
I got up early this morning because of withdrawals. Plus I thought I might start early again. Get my sleeping in order. I was browsing around on youtube when I found an old friend. He lives in another country far far away. I never expected to hear or see this person again. We only hung out for a week but we had a really good time. It was a nice surprise. I left him a message how he’d inspired me to get out and perform (good for the soul and good for the crowd) When he left to continue his stuff around the world I thought about how I could make a difference. He was a street artist/comedian.
About a year later when I was agoraphobic. I needed an outlet for my adreniline and nervous feelings. So I learned to dance (from the internet). At that stage I had forgotten the real meaning in performing to an audience. I spent a year at home practicing getting a bit better everyday. Then my mate from high school really pushed me(in a good way) to go to a dance studio and meet other dancers. So I did. I started a girls crew and we did really well. I left there and became solo again until another year later when I got an unexpected call from a 13 year old dancer saying I should do a show in the middle of the mall. I really respect this kid so I summond up the courage to do it. That day kicked off my dance with a bigger crew. They were really supportive as I was the only girl. They got me to gigs and shows even interstate show. I am forever grateful for. We have since split up but in our hearts we are still family. We will always be dancers and friends. So I am again solo. It doesn’t bother me but I would love to get down more with the kats perfoming in town and on the street. I know this is so cliche but I want to dance for the love of the dance. bboying will always be the bastard son of hiphop as long as people keep not accepting it as just as much important art form as scratching, painting, emcing. Very rarely respected enough by the rest of the hip hop community. One day it will get the respect it needs I’m sure. But in the meantime Im gonna dance till I drop. The earth is a really big dance floor. Thats what makes me happy.
I have to dance at a show on this Saturday. My fitness isn’t up to sctrach so I’m riding my bike going for walks and dancing to get back there. I have a few combos and sets ready. The main thing is I’ll have fun and I’ll have in my mind this dance will be for my dear friend that passed away in 2005. He was a magnificent mc. He even did a song about me. I loved all his rhymes.
I know everything will be okay,… Wish me luck anyway!!!
Peace out G’s
Thanks to bboy Katsu (JPN), Budda (Canada), Storm (US), Kool Herc (US) You’ve been a huge inspiration for my dance. And of course all my close friends that have stood by me and helped me through the hard stuff.